Nobody on Earth asked for this.
Get Lower
We regret to inform you that Meta CEO and founder Mark Zuckerberg is now a musical artist — and his first track, a cover of “Get Low” by Lil Jon and the Eastside Boyz recorded in tandem with T-Pain, is a sonic assault.
In an Instagram post, the 40-year-old tech tycoon dedicated the track by “Z-Pain” — an embarrassing portmanteau of Zuckerberg and T-Pain, née Faheem Rashad Najm — to his wife, Priscilla Chan Zuckerberg.
“‘Get Low’ was playing when I first met Priscilla at a college party, so every year we listen to it on our dating anniversary,” Zuckerberg wrote in the caption of the post, which featured several photos of the philanthropic couple over the years. “This year I worked with [T-Pain] on our own version of this lyrical masterpiece.”
For those who didn’t have the song imprinted directly onto their developing brains way back in 2002, that “lyrical masterpiece” includes the incredible verses “to the window / to the wall / til the sweat drip down my balls / all these females crawl.”
Hearing the milquetoast Zuckerberg, of all people, sing those lines in his heavily pitch corrected voice is not for the faint of heart, and we do not advise you listen to this at home unless you are prepared to take ample psychic damage.
Please, No More
T-Pain coming in on the second verse is such a relief that you can almost forget what you were forced to listen to before — until Zuck once again hops on the annoying acoustic beat, reminiscent of so many ukulele girls in the early 2010s except somehow much worse.
There was, in fact, an infamous acoustic cover of “Get Low” released in 2011 that got more than 1.5 million views on YouTube — which was 1.5 million too many, should not have been replicated under any circumstances, and is still better-sounding than the Z-Pain version.
Anyway, this unrequested collab seems to be part of the millennial tech mogul’s hypebeast rebranding — though the fact that a similar travesty was deeply uncool more than a decade ago makes the strategy dubious in late 2024.
More on the emperor’s new clothes: Cringey Tech Execs Swoon Over Mark Zuckerberg’s “Cool” New Look
